Somewhere between your 20’s and turning 30, life takes a turn for the responsible, mundane and sometimes downright boring. How does this happen? Does it have to happen? I’m sure it doesn’t happen to everyone. Why do I feel like it’s happened to me?
I had a thought the other day, that just now, in my life, the crappy boring things I have to do far outweigh the fun, exciting, soul nourishing things I get to do. And I’ve been wondering how to tip the scales back.
I am a mum to one gorgeous 19mth girl, and one gorgeous girl in utero due in 7 weeks. I’ve given up work, taken on the mum and home role, and to be really blunt, I don’t actually enjoy it all that much.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my daughter to bits, she is delightful, and smart, and growing way too quickly. I appreciate her every day. But its the other stuff that comes with it, like housework, cleaning, bills, administration, shortage of money, lack of time and abandonment of friends, that I find so morbidly depressing at times. There are some amazing people and things in my life that I get excited about…if I can rustle it up..but those moments are pretty limited. I just can’t shake the feeling that I need to be doing more……..
So what do I DO?
These are the things I think about doing:
Abandoning all ‘normality’, moving to Asia (yes, with a toddler and a newborn) and immerse our family in a new culture to add a bit of spice to life. (hubby is not really on board with this one)
Getting a housekeeper and a nanny, just to be here at home while I’m at home, so they can do all the things I don’t want to do. Then I can focus on moving furniture and redesigning rooms, or painting pictures, or sewing, or starting an awesome online business.
These are the things I might have to do:
Get a new attitude about the things I need to do in life, take responsibility, get them done really quickly and then plan more fun things into my day.
Realise that having a nanny/housekeeper is pretty unattainable right now.
Suck it up and just focus on being a good mum and wife.
I’m torn, do I fight the feelings of discontent OR do I harness the desire to do great, fun and different things? Am I ungrateful or unsettled for a reason?